Monday 17 October 2011

The Connaught Mayfair

It was raining. I looked for a shelter inside my trike. Suddenly I was approached by two, smartly dressed gents in their fifties. "Take us to Connaught Mayfair. We want to pass by Bentley salon." - They politely ordered. I started to pull down the rainshield. They said they didn't want it. "You'll get wet." I warned. "We'll get wet like you guys!" I smiled internally, thinking that to get wet together is a great example of solidarity... There was something unusual about them. They spoke English with a very thick Atlantic twang, however between themselves they used French. It was a very bizzare French though. Were they some exceptionally snobby morons or, maybe, they came from Quebec? We will never find out... They asked me to stop by the corner of Bruton St. and Berkley Sq. to take a look at those fat Bentleys inside the salon. They cheered and shouted like little boys. Both of them produced their mobile phones and started to take some pictures... After a while they got enough of that and sat back on my trike. "Let's go to the hotel." Then, very unfortunately indeed, I got cofused. I couldn't remind myself where that bloody hotel exactly was. I was going in circles for a while. They didn't mind much, clearly enjoying our little journey. Finally I stopped by Chesterfield hotel on Charles St. and asked at the reception. Those very kind people who work there gave me directions. My destination was near by. I got there quickly. Believe me - The Connaught Mayfair is a VERY high profile hotel. I felt quite guilty so I said quickly: "Gentlemen, my apologies. If I were a Japanese I would commit a ritual suicide." They laughed. One of them asked: "How much do we owe you?" "20 quid." "20 what?" He didn't get it. "20 pounds." "Nooooo! This is too much!" I was soaked, sweaty and felt pretty humiliated. I just wanted to get over it quickly. "Okay then! Pay me whatever you like..." They exchanged a few phrases in their grotesque French. Then counted some change, one of them passed it to me and they were gone. Some say rich people live too far from reality to be human but "it occurred to me that, like most of the very rich people I had known, he was trying to save money" to buy a new Bentley, I suppose.

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