Rickshaw rider's night out

Some time ago some people, who took on writing a blog about rickshaws in London, asked me to prepare a guest post. So I did. They published it lately http://rickshawsinlondon.com/guest-posts/, omitting some interesting and important parts. I thought it would be a shame to lose them, therefore I decided to post a full, original version below:

"Hi everyone! I've been riding a rickshaw for a little while. I even write a blog about it! Here's a handful of a practical knowledge I'd like to share with you:
- Beware very drunk/drugged people. They are capable of anything. I insist: ANYTHING!
- Anytime you can tell that your potential customers are too rough or just untrustworthy charge them upfront.
- Some rickshaw riders are monkeys. Greedy, unscrupulous, selfish and cynical. They will steal your lifts, they will undercut your prices. Smile and be patient! There are many nice people around every corner. You will find them.
- Some people out there will treat you like an animal. You don't have to take anything like this. If anybody calls you names, suggests that £5 is a lot of money where you come from, tells you that your father drives an elephant, maliciously tries to finger your arse or to set your jacket, on your back, on fire with a lighter - don't take them anywhere. You are self employed, which means that you work for yourself. Dignity has no price.
- Some shameless, drunk women will try to allure you into having sex with them, on your rickshaw. They may even suggest a sexual encounter as a form of payment. Don't you EVER make out on your trike. She may change her mind later and accuse you of a rape. You will go to prison for certain sure. You have probably heard how they treat rapists over there. Take her home or pay her a visit. Use a condom.
- A bad boy element is an intrinsic part of the nightlife... Those gentlemen will try to force you to drive them around for free, will attempt to take your trike away from you or basically will sit on your rickshaw refusing to go away. Never show them that you are scared (no matter how intimidated you are feeling). Never try to be cocky or aggressive (you can't fight a bunch of hoodlums on your own). Talk politely but show them that you are self confident. Low profile people's minds are erratic. They will get bored soon and will be gone.
- Avoid a physical confrontation at any price! Remember: you don't go out to fight, but to make money. Nevertheless when worse comes to worse and you need to defend yourself, never punch people in their teeth, for their teeth will easily cut the skin on your bare knuckles. You bleed a lot, scars remain forever and what if your opponent was venomous? Simply kick their balls. It works. BTW if anybody puts a knife to your gut, unless your second name is Seagul, Norris or Van Damme, don't struggle. It's not worthy.
- Read my blog. It's great! ;~)"