05:15 AM

That guy stopped me on Shaftesbury Avenue. He said he was from Liverpool. "I want to smash some pussy, bruv!" His nose was pretty deformed. I could see scars on his cheek and forehead. He said he was a man of principles and therefore he wanted to spend on sex maximum £20. By that time all the cheap brothels were already shut. I explained that to him. "Take me to Kings Cross then!" I named the price. He said he'd rather take a minicab but he didn't move. I gave him a better price. He got excited and patting on my canopy exclaimed: "I'll give you ten pounds solid cash! I'm an Arab, bruv! Sumtin' is bettah than nutin'!!!" I laughed and wished him good night. He looked surprised.